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Order, order!!

I am becoming a bit bogged down with my 'routine' of dieting. Previously as a dieter, I have planned menus, made graphs to plot progress, organised shopping lists and generally relied on my 'order' to motivate me.

As expected, I have done exactly the same this time round, menus, lists etc but realised this morning that who the hell needs 5 different graphs to diet?? Madness...

I know that planning and recording what I eat is a PRIORITY. I also know that all the other behaviours I have when approaching a diet can be unhealthy this is why I started this journey at 21 stone and 5 whole pounds!! Order does not = thin. So, my epiphany may be obvious to some but I have to get my head round my own responsibility to losing weight and not skirt arounf the problem by drawing yet another graph! Afterall, it's my mouth I have shoved food into for so long now.

Phew! OK, rant over...

It's Monday and the end of 3 weeks dieting so here is my weekly update...

Start weight - 21 stone 5 pounds

Week one - 20 stone 11 pounds - 8 pounds loss
Week two - 20 stone 7 pounds - 12 pounds loss
Week three - 20 stone 1 pound - 18 pounds loss

18 pounds in 3 weeks is super progress but ultimately unsustainable so I am reviewing my calorie intake and ajusting it to ensure that I hit a minimum of 1000 calories a day otherwise, I may go into 'starvation mode'!

I also know that while my weight loss may slow down sonewhat, losing 8-10 pounds per month will mean that I hit my first goal of 18 stone by summer time (or before maybe???) Here are my goals and the reasons for them...

1. 18 stone - this is the weight I was when I met my second husband and although heavy, I did look much better because I am tall, I could just about get by at 18 stone confidence wise.

2. 16 stone - I have not been 16 stone since I was 20 years old - before the children and after the age of 20, I just piled it on and remained at 20 stone for many years. The extra stone and a half I have to lose came with my last baby just 4 months ago so I am now at my pre baby weight of 20 stone and 1 pound!! Wow!!

3. 12 stone - I was 12 stone at the end of school...'nuff said xx

One stone lost today!!

Day 11 of diet started pre operatively, and I am down 1 whole stone! The weight loss has slowed down but i'm pretty chuffed as I thought I would be crap at dieting before my first fill - and believe me, you have to diet AND feel hungry but so far, going well. I am being a bit informal about my liquid diet and mostly eating sloppy food now to be honest as I was soooo hungry. for example, today my intake has been...

3 sloppy scrambled eggs - 240 cals
1 sloppy weetabix - 90 cals
1 low fat custard with mashed rhubarb (lovely!) - 280 cals
1 ocean pie (split into 2 servings over the day) - 260 cals

Total cals - 870

Feels like more and I am happy and full!! I will try and up my cals intake because I do not want them to drop so low, my body starts fighting back! So have ordered protein shake (isolate as does not contain lactulose etc) and will bounce up intake with that.

Helen x

Weight not 'falling off' as expected in fantasy world (!) I tend to live in... But, it is going in the right direction and I may rethink my weighing daily policy as it is so strange to not lose any weight for 4 days then maybe lose 2lb then maybe put a pound back on etc... takes a lot of getting your head round!

I am having my first fill on June 2nd and really looking forward to it as it can only improve my 'hungry belly' which continues to growl and crave chocolate cake! But, resolve still good and new sloppy weetabix for breakfast helps hugely to keep growly belly at bay.

I go back to work in a week and a half after 4 months off on maternity leave. I have that dread now, knowing i have a lot of catching up to do and work will hit me like a tidal wave but looking forward to having more of a routine to my day.

We have also bought a manual treadmill (bloody hard work!) and dug out my old trampette (never used!) and made a 'mini gym' in our tiny conservatory. I began my walking plan yesterday completing a 15 min walk with the middle 5 min at fast pace followed by 15 min on the trampette...nearly killed me!

Helen x

Better mood today!!

Still hungry but coping much better... I spoke to my bariatric nurse who basically said that many who have the band fitted do not feel hungry due to inflamation, band restriction without fill etc but some are starving!! (Me!)

She recommended that I up my protein intake although difficult on a liquid diet but will add protein powder to slimfasts, and also, I can begin with runny weetabix, runny scrambled eggs etc.

This seems to be working quite well and has taken the edge off but I have realised that the daily battle starts here! If I am to lose weight long term then I battle everyday. Period. Somedays I will win and somedays I will lose but battle I must... (visualise me in suit of amour!)

Anyway... weekly weight update afterall, it's Monday!!

Start weight - 21 stone and 5 pounds

Week one (op day) - 20 stone and 11 pounds (8lb loss)
Week two - 20 stone and 7 pounds ( 4lb loss)

Total loss so far = 12lb
Pounds to go = 123lb

I am STARVING!!!

Well, that honeymoon wore off quick didn't it!

I am sooooo hungry and pissed off that I am hungry. No, it's not 'head hunger' and my stomach is gurrgling. i have emailed the nurse to find out what the hell is going on because I know from past experience, the one thing that makes me fail is HUNGER that's why I found £7000 to have this band put in!!

Yes, I am also in a very bad mood, pissed off and hungry......